Flash Fiction: Still life with colour


by Sue Trollip

Outside your front door is a pond with misty sunrises and bloodied sunsets. Already the ducklings are waddling and the snakes are making S bends in the grass. Spring dangles brighter and warmer each day.

The morning mist settles in your work brain, lifting only on the drive home. You breath. Air minus the ducts, light without bulbs, noise that is not white. You wonder where your path is leading and why sometimes it’s an autobahn and others a country lane. Your inner toddler asks ‘Are we there yet?’ but your adult self has no answer.

Bucking the circle of frustration you drive to the lake. Unlike Narcissus you take in the reality. Then you look at the clouds congealing on the blue mountains and smile. Your path ahead is steep so you begin to prepare for the summit. Fastening your seat-belt you slowly raise your hands. Whoohoo!

(150 words)

Photograph ©Dawn Miller

A flash fiction challenge.


16 thoughts on “Flash Fiction: Still life with colour

  1. Wonderful! Just letting it all hang out and enjoying the fresh air and scenery. (I am hoping she isn’t committing suicide). I enjoyed reading your story. I would like to welcome you to FFfAW and hope you enjoy it and keep coming back!

  2. luckyjc007 says:

    Excellent story. Very descriptive and gives the reader the emotions felt while trying to get to her place of refuge.

  3. jac dowling says:

    I’ve never hacked flash fiction Sue, but this is good stuff. I hope the upward slope is not too steep – and that Spring puts a fresh complexion on things. Good to read new voices in the comments!

  4. Susan says:

    Lovely, Sue. I was thinking that you’ve been in a new place for just over a year now, so the changing of the seasons has gone full circle. It must be exciting to experience your second transition into spring. Enjoy the fresh mountain air and the beautiful lakes…

  5. Tastyniblets says:

    Lovely story Sue, very artistic use of imagery there.. I also love the title 🙂

  6. Creatopath says:

    Brilliant Sue. Loved all the beautiful descriptions of the sunset and the surroundings. The end sentence had a “Thelma and Louise” feel to it!

  7. married2arod says:

    I thought the way you opened up the setting was very nice. Descriptive.

  8. Ameena k.g says:

    I love the details in your beautiful descriptions and how they oozed emotions. This is a wonderful piece.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s