When I grow up I want to be Fiona. No, no, not the green Shrek monster but rather the petite bomb maker in Burn Notice.
Now Fee, you must understand, is my complete opposite. The first example of this is that while I always have a notebook and a pen in my handbag Fee has a stash of C4 in hers. Yes she is ready at any given moment to blow up a car, a building or a bad guy. She’s the woman you want around in an emergency. Although I’m more handy when you want to make a shopping list.
Fee handles guns beautifully, like an extension of her arm she loads, aims and fires dead on target, she also does all this while wearing killer heels. I’ve aimed at a few tin cans in my time but never in heels.
If ever Fee is separated from her handbag she can make a fantastic bomb out of a few ingredients lying around the kitchen or bathroom whereas I was never that good at science, although I can whip up a lovely loaf of bread using only 7 ingredients.
I rely on Fee for my adrenaline shot each week, while I recline on the couch. I rely on her to be the brave, daring, wild, adventurous woman that I am not.
But, this week the joke is on me because I have a job working in the ER department of a hospital. I’m on the night shift. The thought of the antiseptic hospital smell, darkness and blood is already making my stomach churn.
Perhaps I will no longer need Fee, perhaps I will quit or, perhaps I will turn into Stephen King … I’ll keep you posted.